Esther the Wonder Pig is a Canadian pig with quite the amazing story—and, as a feline journalist extraordinaire, I know amazing. Esther was born in summer 2012 and then adopted by her parents, Derek and Steve, who thought she was a micro pig. When she grew to weigh more than 450 pounds, they realized that Esther was no micro pig. But their love for her was already cemented, so she became a part of the family, living in a house just like any well-respected cat does. Esther completely changed her owners’ lives, and not just because she weighs as much as a motorcycle. Derek and Steve now follow a vegan lifestyle, as do Esther and her canine siblings. As an avid fan of Esther—we animal celebrities need to stick together—I visited her Facebook page and learned that Esther and her family are opening an animal sanctuary. I recently chatted online with Esther, talking to her about her vegan diet and whether this sanctuary will have a sunny couch for celebrity cats to occasionally crash on. GROUPON THE CAT: Good afternoon, Esther. Is that a family name? Mine is a company name. ESTHER: My name was Kjiji for a couple weeks at first, till my dads decided they just couldn’t live without me. Then they named me Esther. GTC: You’re not only a pig (my favorite species after cat) but a vegan pig. What do you eat every day? And how much food can you pack down in a day? E: Well, I’m so lucky to have fresh fruits and veggies every day. I love bananas! I pretty much love everything. If I could eat all day, I would. I eat roughly three times a day with lots of snacks. GTC: You don’t eat any animals? What about laser pointers? Like, if you caught a laser pointer, you seriously wouldn’t eat it? E. Animals are friends, not food! But if I caught hold of a laser pointer, it probably wouldn’t stand a chance. GTC: You are helping your parents launch Esther's Kitchen. Tell me—aaaacckkk. Sorry, hairball. Tell me about this endeavor. E: Can I eat that? It looks yummy! My dads wanted to share with everyone how easy it was transitioning to vegan and wanted others to see how everyday recipes could be changed to suit living a plant-based lifestyle. GTC: Do you help your parents cook meals at all? I am not much of a cook myself, but I do have a personal can opener on staff. E: When I try to help, I kind of just make a mess of things, but at least I try. I’m like a bull in a china shop some days. GTC: On April 1, I read in an article that Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi adopted you! Do you get to dance with Ellen on her show? I wish Ellen would adopt me. Oh, nevermind. That was an April Fools’ joke, wasn’t it? You almost fooled the Groupon the Cat; I commend you. Did you have anything to do with this joke? E: That was a great joke that VegNews posted. No, she didn’t adopt me. We had nothing to do with it, but we thought it was brilliant. If Ellen does come knocking, I’ll have my heels ready to dance my little heart out with her! GTC: You currently live in a home with two humans, two dogs, and two cats (tell Delores I say hey). What’s this I hear about moving to bigger quarters? E: Yes, we are currently all living together in this tiny house just outside of Toronto, Canada. We love how close we all are! Delores says “Meow.” We have an accepted offer on a farm that will become our permanent home, and your contribution to our Indiegogo campaign will help us bring Esther's Sanctuary to life. The sanctuary used to be a dream, but it is so much more than that now. It has become our mission, and we will move heaven and earth to make it happen. GTC: Will you guys have Xbox at your animal sanctuary? Follow-up question: Can I hang out? E: I don’t think so. I think I’ll be spending most my time outside enjoying the sunshine and chasing my friends around. Would you like to come visit? We’d love to have you! Interview transcribed by Katie Cortese, animal translator, Groupon Photos courtesy of Esther the Wonder Pig